craving

My Imagination

I think about you
When I'm alone and it's quiet
Light or dark out
I think about what I want to do to you
And I imagine scenarios
I picture your chiseled body
My body craves
My pussy weaps
My teeth bite my lips
My voice moans and whimpers
What I want to give up
Just to feel the emptiness inside me filled up by you
I lay in my bed with my legs spread, pussy open just wishing you'd fill me up.
Even as I write this, my pussy clenches, my lips swollen from my teeth biting them.
My clit pulses in time to my crazy love sick yearning heart
Its ache haunting me again

It might be easier to slip away into a deep dark haunted forest where I am lost in a fog as deep as a sink hole, then to try to figure out how to ease the need in me that's never ever, ever been close to being satisfied.

Maybe I'm just a slimy over zealous bog witch doomed to be cursed forever with an aching clit and an empty pussy.

Should I tell you what goes on in my imagination?
My filthy mind goes haywire daily thinking about you.
Sometimes I feel like this blog is the only thing keeping me from going utterly insane.
Thank the (whatever god you worship) that I created this alter ego to save me from myself.
Im not sure if I'm saved or not but at least I can write these words.
At least I can be my true slutty self here cause in real life I have to you know, behave and shit.
Uggh 😒
How I really, really don't want to anymore.

So if you could just come over, the front doors open, dodge the gaurd dogs and come suck my clit and finger me at the same time, but grab the freak sheet so I can just squirt everywhere without my bed turning into an ocean so I don't have to do a ton of laundry tomorrow because it's so much work cleaning up a king sized bed and even if you grab the huge stack of towels out of the laundry room cupboard and stack them up I still will soak through then all cause I'm just a crazy cum slut, that would be great, okay thanks bye 👋 😘

But seriously, the tongue-finger(s) combo would be so relieving right now.
Or just use all my toys on me and shove your cock down my throat to keep me quiet.
Or ravage me over and over and over again ... pullllllling the orgasums out, extending them into one huge bliss session until I am floating in an orgasumic bliss bubble.
Totally enraptured in you.
Just the thought of you.
There's just a crazy wild girl over here that's craving you.

Devotion?

"...the man follows you around staring at you like you're a goddess.
...I know that look.  Like his entire world was ending.  No wonder the man is about to go rip apart the fabric of the universe for you."

I've seen this type of devotion in real life with a friend, to his wife.  

I've read about this kind of love in books. 

I listen to this in songs. 

But I've experienced nothing like it.

Abuse, neglect, come in spades.  

Now as I reach mid life, no longer regarded as young, I experience this as prejudice. 

Fuck what I would give to a man to be the centre of his universe for even one minute. To really feel it. My heart hurts just thinking about it. I suppose that's why I still try. Maybe one day it won't be some far off pipe dream.  Maybe one day I'll be the transfiguration that sets the world on fire.

I have this craving deep inside of me

I long for more then just vanilla sex.
The effort I put into myself deserves to be given more. 
Tease me, worship my pussy, adore me, I need to be the focal point in your life.
Back me up against the wall
Hold my neck while you kiss me
Make my knees weak as you spin me around
The coldness of the wall contrasting with the heat of my breasts 
Raise my hands above my head
Tie them up there
On a hook 
Restrict my movement
Make me whimper while you slowly drop down and drag your tongue down my upper thigh
Trace the top of my lace stocking with your fingertips
Make me beg for what's to come
I whimper quietly while you fasten the leather cuffs to my ankles
Spread me apart and attach the cuffs to a bar
So open so vulnerable 
So overwhelmingly aroused
My pussy is clenching air already
Kiss me before you blindfold me
Tell me I'm such a good girl
Tell me I'm your only one
Tell me to be good and wait a moment for you 
Tell me you'll be back with treats
Tell me how much you want to please me
Leave me there waiting and wanting
Go and gather supplies
Candles, matches, ice, sparkling water, strawberries, chocolate 
Light a match and I can smell the sulphur burn
I tingle in anticipation 
Will you cover me in hot wax?
Or is the candle for ambiance?
Or...
This is what I love
This is what I crave
The unknown
The anticipation 
The desire to be teased and pleased
I feel your teeth on my stockings
Your fingers, your hands lowering them down
Stepping out of my stilettos onto the ground 
Your teeth nip at my thighs 
You tell me you can smell my arousal and it's turning you on
Clouding your ability to think straight 
Your dick strains where it's confined 
Wanting to be let out and burry itself into my burning hot, dripping wet pussy.
Taking the candle you tilt the flame and drop the first molten bead of wax onto my leg
I hiss out in surprise and gasp as you continue 
Moaning and crying out 
My panties are soaked
I love this
You stop 
The front of my thighs are covered in dried wax
Without warning an ice cube runs up the back of my thigh
I try to jump away in surprise but I am caught
Caught up in the exquisite torture of pain and pleaure
Hot and cold sensations
You bring the ice up
Rip my panties off of me
Stand and shove them in my mouth
With your hand across my mouth you still my cries so I can hear you
Ice cube in hand you slowly insert it into my pussy
My eyes wide with shock
I scream into your palm
"Hold it inside of you until it melts or I'll Punish you" 
I squirm as my eyes water
Clamping my pussy muscles around the torturous element 
You drop down to your knees and lick the melting ice from my outer lips
I am on fire for you
No one else can give me this exquisite high
Just you, my master
Another icy vixen winds its way up my other thigh
My muscles tremble as a second cube is inserted into my pussy
Biting down on my panties trying to keep control
Fuck I need to cum and you know it 
You lips kiss where my clit is hiding 
I would have fallen if I wasn't held up 
I won't be able to stand forever
Your tongue reaches into my now ice cold pussy
The hot contrast causing new waves of sensation
In my mind I'm begging you 
Trying to keep my pussy clamped shut is impossible with your tongue probing me 
"Let go my delicious one, let me taste you"
I release my muscles and pant trying to regain some sense of control
I missed something in the process and feel a new sensation sliding up into me
Gently just inside
Gliding over my clit
I moan and throw my head back
You stand and take the panties from my mouth
"Taste yourself" you tell me and I open my mouth, taking a bite
My tongue tingles with the flesh of a strawberry coated in my juices.
Your mouth joins mine as we share the taste of the most forbidden fruit
"You intoxicate me" you say to me as you break off the kiss.
Your lips find my neck as your hands reach down and cup my breasts
Moaning under your touch as you feel the weight of them in your hands
Rolling the nipples gently 
Please ....
Escapes my lips
You pull at them gently as your response to my plea
I cry out and you reach for my next surprise 
Thousands of tingles erupt on my skin
You pour sparkling water over my sensitive flesh
Your tongue licks up my breasts 
Sucking both my nipples in turn 
My legs are about to give out and I sag forward against you
Gripping one arm around my waist 
You hold me upright with your strong embrace 
Whispering in my ear you tell me
"Its time for you to cum my beauty. 
Let it all out."
Your fingers work their way to my g spot holding the pressure there
Gently working the area with smooth fluid motions 
"Let go for me
Let it all go
That's it you are such a good girl.
Cum all over my hands
Spray me.
That's it my good little cum slut"
All I can do is moan and cry and scream my release 
Give in to you and trust that you will care of me,
You will take care of my body, my heart, my soul.
My body erupts into shivers as you gently untie my restraints and carry me to the bed 
Letting me recover in your arms, in your embrace.
I am lost in your gentle praises.
When I recover you know I will satisfy your needs 
Maybe we will make sweet delicious love
Where I climb on top and rotate ny hips with your cock buried deep inside of me swirling around my cervix building up to a deep long long orgasum.
Maybe you will fuck my mouth with my head hanging off the bed giving you access to my throat.
But that's for another fantasy. 
Indulge with me again soon ♡
Xo

Praise Kink

Hi baby,
I need to make a confession to you.
I have a newly found praise kink.
Well, I knew that I always liked being called a good girl.
To the point where it makes my pussy tighten and do it a few times and I'll cream myself...
But I heard accidentally on a reel, a guy describing a scenario and I can't get it out if my head. I wish I could find the video again.
I need you to help me reinact it.

Take me from behind,
with your delicious thick cock all up in me,
put one hand on my throat and the other hand run it up and down my back,
pull my hair,
squeeze my breasts,
pull on my nipples,
rub my clit and
tell me I'm a pretty princess. Tell me how good I take daddy's cock.
Tell me I'm such a good girl for taking all of your cock so well,
so deep,
so hard.
Hold my neck and tell me to open my eyes
Tell me to watch myself cum
Tell me not to take my eyes off yours.
Spank me if I shut them
When the pleasure gets too intense
Punish me for being such a naughty girl.
Call me your dirty little slut as you shove your cock
Down my throat.
Oh daddy tie me up on a saint Andrews Cross
With my legs spread wide.
Light A red tall pillar candle and place it between my legs.
Tell me that if I extinguish it, I won't get hot wax poured on me.
Make me try not to drip my pussy juices down onto the candle.
While you torture my breasts
My nipples.
Oh yes please daddy.
And then just for fun
Slap the insides of my thighs
With a paddle
Before you make me cum.
With your fingers now,
So I have to fight myself not to squirt.
All over the candle and extinguish it.
I so want the wax play fun.
The burning heat.
The pain
The exquisite pleasure that comes.
Oh fuck.
Please daddy
I just want to be your little cum slut
Love your dream girl
Xoxo

Such a Dream

Hey baby,
I go about my day thinking of you.
Walking through a dream
Holding your hand
Smiling at you across the table
Over brunch
Taking your hand.
Running my fingers through yours, over yours, between yours.
Gently touching
Needing contact.
One day you'll be forver mine.

I walk about my day
Damp between my legs
Because I'm thinking of you.
Wanting to sit beside you through my meetings.
Wanting you to be my plus one.
Wishing it was your thigh I was squeezing in excitement today,
When I heard the news about who would be teaching my little one soon.
It was just me sitting alone.
That's okay I've got my phone
So I've got you close.
As close as it's going to get until the stars align.

Wishing I could hover my lips as close as I could to yours without touching them.
Breathing in your aura.
Needing you surrounding me.
So close our souls align.
Mesh together.
Our spirit guides conspired for us to meet.
I wonder how that conversation went in the ethers....
I wonder if we already knew before this life time that we'd come together and meet.
Doesn't matter.
All I know, is how grateful I am.

How much I long for the ability to get my hands on you.
Touching you gently.
Everywhere I can.

I never want to stop holding you.
Wrapped all up or just a hand to hold.
I'll take whatever I can.
Whatever you've got.
Good days and bad.
The whole shit storm of your past.
I need you or I'll suffocate in grief.
I'm addicted to the way you make me feel.
Like I am special, pretty, you make me feel whole again.

I think about you when I'm out and about.
When I have a spare moment I think dirty thoughts.
How I want to roll on top of you, sit on or climb on top.
Ride your cock.
Cause I just want to be close to you.
Connect with your eyes, your lips, your breath, your soul.

I really just want to let you be a man.
Give you a safe place to be.
Fill in the cracks of your heart with the crimson fluid of my love.
Let it drip and drizzle, pour out and consume any part of you that you might assume isn't enough.

I just want to help you feel whole, peaceful, serene.
Give you a reason to exhale and be seen.

If I could do all that,
Know I'd be forever your happiest
Dream girl
Xoxoxo

Blur

Hi baby,
These days seem to blur into each other.
I sleep, I cook, I nap, I drive, this activity I go to for my little one, cook some more, sweep the floor, fix this thing, solve that problem.
The juicer breaks, my dog needs a new leash so he doesn't get lost in the forest again, I've got too many roosters running around the coop harassing my hens.

Some days my body is so tired and achy but I've never been so strong and fit in my life.
My big dog, his name is Bear, he has these giant paws that looks like he has Bear claws. He is a big 50kg boy and I can hold him back when he's launching himself at the odd car that drives by when we are out for a walk.
You know you've got a big dog when everything you have to buy is the biggest in the shop. The biggest bed, the biggest choke chain, the biggest retractable leash, the biggest coat ... XXL ... you get the picture.
The universe unexpectedly brought him into my life when my next door neighbour died and he needed a home. I had the land, and the time, and space, and funds to have him ... and the patience to train him. So he's mine and I love him.
Ive never felt so safe before with this big boy in my house and by my side.
I suppose it's like a replacement for you darling.
Or maybe just a temporary crutch.
There's only so much a dog can give you and he doesn't keep me warm at night.
I thought maybe you'd like to see Bear cause I keep writing about him.

Do you love him too? 
Miss you and everyday I ache for you.
Some mornings I wake up with my fingers inside of me.
I'm devouring books lately. 
Searching for something to fill this need I have inside of me.
A need I know only can be filled by you.

Speak to you soon,
Dream about me tonight ...
Love your dream girl 
Xoxo

I always think of you

My heart is lovely for you
I try to look away 
To turn away
To keep away
But I can't
Even if I'm with another 
I always think of you.

My love
My longing
My Yearning 
My heart needs you.

It's cold and quiet 
I just want you to hold
To feel your heart beat
To know I'm safe 
Heart and soul
In your arms.

Wanted
Needed
Desired
Loved
Accepted
Just as I am
By you.

I wish you'd call me again.
My body longs for your sweet touch.
Nothing satisfys me more than your soul wrapped around mine.

God I miss you. 
Satisfied with nothing.
Everyday that goes by 
My heart just beats stronger for you.
My feelings get more intense.
My desire for you increases.
My knowing that you are the one is cemented. 

You are my one.
My only.
My other half.
Now I just have to wait for you to come around. 

Maybe one day I will get the chance to tell you how I feel.
Until then I'll only want you.
Until then I'll wait and wish to hear from you again. ♡

I’m tired but I need you

I'm tired 
My feet are sore
I'm horney as hell
Fuck I miss you.

I wish you were here
Rub my feet 
Suck my clit
Let me suck your dick.

Oh I'm being nasty tonight
Just want your hands on my hips
Hold me down
Pleasure me.

Only you will do.
Only you can make me cum like that.

In my mind I'm on my knees
Begging and pleading please
Please let me suck your cock 
I'll be your good girl
If you let me.

Collar me 
chain me up
Choke me
You know how I like that
Needing to be dominated
Needing to call you daddy.

Fuck I need you tonight.
Please let me dream of you at least
Doing all those nice things to me.
Like making my ass red
Like making me choke on your cock
Like making me yours.

Darling it's only you I want
Let me be your favourite flavour 
My pussy is ripe for the taking
Worship her.

Whisper dirty things to me
Call me your pretty baby
Your dirty girl
Your real life porn star.

Miss you

I miss you 
So I'm eating cake 
Chocolate cake
In bed at night.
With all the candles on
Watching sex and the city reruns.
I'm not cool or modern
So I have no idea what new shows there are on.

But I really want to talk to you
And I can’t cause your busy
And you don't want to talk to me right now.

I just want to ask
If you still want me in your life.

I try to be productive 
To be responsible 
I woke up early 
Then I feel asleep until noon.

I am trying to help myself feel better 
But I really want to know
What's going on?

Every morning I miss your lips on me.
Every night I want to be wrapped up in your arms.

But now every morning it's just me and my hands getting me off.
It's you in my imagination instead of my bed.

Now every night It's me alone with ice cream or chocolate cake.
Can't you be here so we could play?
I'd love to lick this icing off you.

It's just silent and I don't know where we stand.
I don't text you even though I am dying to.  
I don't call you even though it feels like I'm suffocating in this silence.

Baby are you still my man?

I still love you
My heart beats only for you
I still crave you
My pussy seeks only for you.

So I guess I will just wait and try not to go crazy in the meantime.
I just need to hear you call me your pretty baby again.
💋

What happened?

Can you tell me where I stand?
A month ago I was your pretty baby
You couldn't get enough of me
Now I just get silence
Nothing
No words, no touch, just nothing.
What happened?
Where did I go wrong?

Loving too fiercely,
Wanting too much,
Has always been my down side.
I loved you too fiercely
It's the fire in me.
That's why no one could ever handle me.
I thought you could.
Thought you were man enough to handle my fire.

My fierce passion for you still runs strong through my veins.
But you asked me to back off.
I know that I became the source of your pain.
I'm always too much.
No man can handle me.
I thought you were enough.

But here I am alone again.
But my body still needs you.
My heart is still waiting to be filled with your love, your promises.
My soul is still waiting to be entwined with yours.
Dancing around a taste of eternity.

Perhaps in this physical plane you are still catching up.
My heart beats a rhythm out that's calling to you.
My blood runs through my veins with a taste that's craving for you.
My tongue has a thirst it can't quench until you come.
But maybe you aren't my one.

So I will search until I find a new you.
Someone man enough to handle my fire
My passion
My ferocity.
But I don't want to search again.
I don't want to find anyone else.
I just want to search out where I went wrong.

I will burn forever in search of you. My man. My world. My forfilment. My everything. Even if I have to wait until nothing exists and my soul crumbles,
so be it.

I won't settle until my match arrives. The one who can handle me. The one who can handle the fire of my soul. The passion in my veins. The neediness of my heart. The one who can make me whole again.

If that's not you, can you let me know?
So I can move onto something unknown.
I've been lonely too long to not know how this feels.
But the pain you brought in with the taste of forfilment that you took so blatantly away is too much to bear.

I need you in my life.
Need you wrapped around me again.
Need your love. Your kisses.
I need to be your pretty baby again.
My heart is breaking without you.
Please be my man again.
I don't want search again.
I am too weary.
My strength is fading.
My passion slowly dying.
Please let me know where I went wrong.